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Link of dread:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-sh82kWaEM
Where to start, where to start, where to start.
1. Could the music be any more masking?
Yes, I know it's trailer music, which doesn't HAVE to be associated with the movie in any way. But generic, (gi joe the movie style) rock. - to go with the White People Need Saving; Brown People Are Aggressive Despoiling Conquers.
Aside: Who here wants to pre-spork something at the thought of how, based on the casting (+ teaser and trailer), the sandbender tribes will be portrayed?
Aside2: For some odd reason I got a flash to the Batman movies (maybe the music makes me think action movie?) but it does now make the thought of GIANT KILLER WASPS seem... like it won't fit in M.Night S's vision.
2.Why is everything so dark? The Last Airbender is not LOTR. It's not Aaragorn with greasy hair, having not bathed in forever. It's meant to be bright, powerful, symbolic colours.
Aside3: If there's no blue for the water tribe, is that scandinavian tan meant to represent the elemental nature of pee? Sickly pee?
3. The bare back, upper body naked martial arts movements scene - why is it there? Also why does it look like a kid having been directed to try and look like 'the graceful ninja' - by an older brother, while they organize play by the beach?
4. Am I the only one who wants to weep that the trailer makes it all so GENERIC? So generic in fact, it's taken 3 viewings for me to realize it's not comets falling from the sky in one trailer scene; that's meant to be fire bending.
Generic. I know all the beats already. There will be despair, rebelliousness, rebellious hero-ness, and Aang will get the girl.
Oh crap, now I'm having flashbacks to TMNT movies.
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I am in the midst of catching up to CLAYMORE.
I have a couple of reactions I feel the need to share. I will be mostly vauge, because I don't want them under cut. Please note these aren't even in order of actual appearance.
1. OMG! OMGOMGOMGWTF! EVIL HUNGRY PARASITIC PENISES!
2. OMG OMG OMG EVIL SAINTS!
3. WTF Clare?! This could be really bad, or really good, or possibly some of both.
4. Did the archer slip a little boy some blood in his sleep - cause WTF Control Top Pantyhose!??
5. Men are evil. EVIL!
*Ok, I need to go make some more food now.
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I woke up an hour ago to ligtening and thunder, tried to go back to sleep under my bedding, but finally got up about 30 minutes ago unable to sleep further (I went to bed early). Outside there's a foot of snow balanced on the fence, the trees are weighed down like something out of a winter calendar and I'm officially blocked in - as the snow has filled in the steps leading down to my gate door. It's slowly creeping to fall in between the spaces -of- the door.
I have no idea how the main streets are doing since I don't live on one, but just -off- one. But my street has the sidewalk and the street pretty much evenly blanketed with snow.
There are children who will love this.
Meanwhile it looks like their parents will wake up, stick a head at the window to peer and see and go 'Ahhh! I hope we bought enough everything!'.
Icon: Is unrelated, used for cheering up. Tommy Oliver is my anti drugcabin fever.
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Sequential thoughts:
This would have been so much more interesting if it was Interpol trying to tie things together and not the FBI; Making it truly global. Also, Olivia is totally the cool/hot Agent of 'The Library' from 'The Librarian'. The first one, before they decided to make him geek Bond. Sonya Walger
Oh ho! She's been on LOST (which I don't/wouldn't watch) but also on Terminator: The Sara Connor Chronicles. I don't remember seeing her. Her appearance must be in the later episodes, after I'd already rolled my eyes at Brian Austin Green and stopped watching.
( Topical )
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Yes, I'm totally cycling through tv shows I've seen friends discuss or recc.
( Have Only Watched The Pilot )
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Dear varied anonymous (and not so anonymous) people salivating over Apple's portable larger screened device,
The Japanese have had those capabilities, without Apple's hobbling, for around three years now, possibly five. In fact just this past December I was salivating over the possibility of a CHUWI 300 (and I desperately want the manufacturers to work out the programming and slight hardware problem that meant it couldn't get rebranded with english menus here in the States).
My CHUWI offered me a camera, portable pdf files, wifi access and the ability to read manga, comics (in colour) and books. Listen to music. And watch videos.
Yes, the iPad is the next logical step for Apple. But after all, considering they take ideas completed and in the public's hands in Japan and then respin them and simplify them for American hands - of course the next step was logical.
Meanwhile y'all are going to be paying who knows what for the iPad, if it's not subsidized by some telephone carrier and carrying on like you did when 3G networks hit the US - again 3 years later than Japan.
I honestly don't think I'm a Japanophile in denial. I think I'm just a baby gadget geek. But I seriously want to smack people for, in my eyes, worshipping at the altar of Apple. Especially because so many of you I see, talk about some device of Apple's crapping out on you, or about a friend you know whose device got bricked and the hellish customer service and how Apple's changed over the years and they make their devices disposable - BUT YOU ARE GEEKING OUT LIKE YOU'RE GETTING PAID for something that's sure to bring you frustration down the road.
And yes, if you're getting the idea I chose that metaphore on purpose. The similarities to churches and religious organizations is not an accident.
And also yes, I realize I'm coming from a place of privilege, in that I like research, I have internet access and I'm not afraid to spend hours researching every other word in a description so I can understand what's going on. But since the bulk of you have the same opportunities I do to catch a clue, it all seems very sheeple to me. I cannot believe the 'general public' really thinks Apple is the only company out there to create mobile internet & personal media device. There isn't only one company that makes your fridge or your stove or even your car. So why think there's only one company for the device that does what you want? Are the combined powers of advertising and brand establishment that strong?
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The LJ Forced Gender Binary Choice has happened. All accounts that had something other than male or female now have 'it's personal'. This includes OpenID accounts. This includes communities.
Over at Inkstone's DW, user kiwikiwi said it best:
I guess if you don't fit the gender binary you are defacto "it's personal" or you SHOULD be oh gosh you're clearly a weirdo who shouldn't be telling people anyway!
Fubar + cluskerfuck = Cluckfuckbar Me not choosing male or female on my openid or on a journal account has nothing to do with me being COY or SHY or even CAUTIOUS on the internet. And everything to do with how I choose to identify and label myself. . I know LJ long ago stopped being a place of self expression and became a place to gather eyeballs for consumer commerce and this is just the mighty hand of targeting. But... yeah, I can't find any other words except Cluckfuckbar. Possibly also Clusterfubar. I wonder what advertising category one gets slotted into with a 'it's personal'. How does LJ present content that's slotted 'it's personal'. They already sort for 'age appropriate' with two or is it three filtered to protect click buttons. It's already been noted that certain words could (still can?) get you Thai Lady Bois, "Say Yes To Unequal Marriage' etc. There was that blow up about depression & mental illness. And then there's the possibility of one's content helping to trigger malware. Yes, some of that is the fault of them choosing indiscriminate advertising programs, and those programs having indiscriminate clients. But that still doesn't change how much LJ wants to make money off content and they'd apparently be thrilled if everyone had the most interesting content up about the status quo; white, het, cis. Exhausted. Going to bed. I'm not on LJ, but it's messing with folk and ecru I care about.
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I'm currently mainlining "Murder Victims". It's odd how comforting such shows are. Maybe it's seeing people triumph through thinking over their problems that's so soothing. I don't know. It's just odd to me how much I enjoy them and yet I don't think I could write a procedural. Procedurals are much longer than what I've finally admitted is my forte. Procedural makes me think 'novel'. Though I suppose Poe did a procedural short story - The Purloined Letter.
Things have happened. I did talk to my landlady finally. But it wasn't actually too helpful. She doesn't know or have answers to my questions - she's simply reached a point in her life where she can admit that her life is no longer in the city the house is in. And she was holding on for sentimentality and needs to make a clean cut of it. There's one option, one possibility of how things could turn out that I'm currently holding on to. If that doesn't work out, I figure I have a year or so. And in the meantime I've got to see about the rent increase paperwork.
Really, I'm currently not thinking about it and I'd like not to think about it until the end of the month. I spent a week wound up tight, oh so incredibly anxious and I'd like the chance to recover from that and feel more solid again - as solid as I can be.
So, "Murder Victims" where senseless death is contained with futuristic fantasy science. CSI Miami has holograms now! It is SO My Sunny Batman Show!
PS: I am managing to feed myself. I'm very grateful for that. And that I've recovered from either a stomach flu or food poisoning - whatever made Monday & Tuesday so exhausting and full of ick and ugh.
PPS: Malware @ Livejournal. Something to think about and be aware of. Has anyone encountered pop-ups on iJay when logged out?
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Haven't been to sleep yet. Fending off a panic attack. Sent my landlady an email yesterday only to get an auto-message that she's out of town and doesn't come back till sometime today. So that's more waiting to find out what's what'.
Stayed up reading some Jim Butcher, which was nice. And my head's in a nice place re: writing, which is so desperately a good thing.
But I'm trying to coax myself to leave the house becayse therapy would be not only good, but I could return library books and pick up medicine (really needed) and buy some more pancake mix. It's become the current comfort food.
( And now to possibly triggering conversation. )
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I don't want to hear excuses about why America is letting West Indians die.
I don't want to hear about how they need a stable base camp. I don't want to hear about how they want to set up throughways and 'proper transportation'. I don't want to hear about how worried they are that airdrops will 'cause rioting'. Or hear other people's excuses that 'air drops could damage things'.
I want to know why they turned away CARICOM. I want to know why they made the Haitian government sign over rights to their own airport so now the US controls it. I want to know why their soldiers who supposedly can carry 80lb packs, can't carry 80lbs of water and medicine on their backs to the affected areas and somehow need 'transportation' and 'throughways'.
I want to know why America is too high and mighty to use donkeys and carts and their own two damn feet.
I want to know why there's not water filters and purifiers with no language needed instructions being dropped so people can use what water they -do- have access for the moment until something better can arrive.
I want to know why people and US cameras can waltz around doing disaster porn and aren't booted from sticking cameras in the faces of people who're worried about family and neighbours and their country.
I did not realize I was this ANGRY about this. But I am. Incredibly so. Violently so.
Don't tell me there's no fucking infrastructure. There's no infrastructure Americans recognize. That's more accurate to me.
Stop telling me America is right to wait days for a backhoe when there's soldiers with two arms and two legs and access to a camp shovel.
THAT IS PRIVILEGE.
Privilege while people die.
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| 2010-01-14 17:39 |
| So it's the end of the business day Thursday... |
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| +deewee, willow's sett |
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And I have not had the conversation with my landlady we were supposed to have about her selling the property that contains my apartment. That was the news I got early Tuesday morning that was related to a phone-call on Sunday the 9th that I missed.
She's decided to sell.
( When Will We Have Conversation? )
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| 2010-01-12 13:11 |
| Heard from the landlord |
| Public |
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| willow's sett |
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The most pressing thing is what I'd feared - she's planning to sell the house.
The second thing is a rent increase - though I'm not at all sure how that will work. Do I contact rental assistance and tell them my rent's being raised? Or that I might be moving?
Kinda numb. Have to pull myself together to get to therapy today.
Landlady has someone coming to check the house on Thursday and would like to speak to me then. She'd wanted to speak to me in person about it.
I should eat something.
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My landlord apparently called me yesterday - didn't hear the phone, didn['t get indicated there were any messages - found out just now. Called her back. Will now have tension and anxiety until she tells me what's up.
All sorts of things are going through my head - along with a bit of mental screaming of "No no no no no" because I don't want to lose stability.
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Look if you're white and that includes Jewish white, it is no longer enough for me to know the intimate details of your life for the past 5 years. It doesn't matter if you've sent me holiday or birthday cards or even gifts. I can appreciate all of that and STILL think from now on, you better as hell bring your A GAME when it comes to issues of white privilege - because I just do not have the energy anymore for passive aggressive, I'm-a-white-liberal-why-are-you-picking-on-me BULLSHIT.
If I bother to point out your pantslessness, consider that I'm still actually giving you the blasted time of day and hike up your damn drawers or put ass to curb. And don't let me see you mugging surprise about how you got there. My cellar is full of fine vintage white woman's tears.
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Apparently writing out deep thoughts results in my crashing for uhm... 12 or 14 hours straight. Who knew?
Also? Canadian Anonymous comment to my Wall O Text post, shows me that whole thing about the internet drawing together those who think and reason, and those who prefer to live their lives in little boxes reacting to Pavlov's bell.
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Which isn't necessarily a statement the following words will be all about groiny bits bumping, or not bumping. I could, I realize now, have titled this 'Stopping To Smell The Flowers' - but that's rather broad, even if I realize there's a thread running through personality/personhood aspect re: physical intimacy and affectional orientation and all the rest that matches things in writing (my writing) and who knows what more.
But this post is because when I think things out I write.
( tl; dr - no really. NO. REALLY. Giant Wall Of Text. )
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I totally have an introvert's crush on Sarah because she's so still waters run deep and quiet and peaceful. And there aren't that many people in the world who feel quiet and calm and soothing/replenishing. But I think, one does not actually tell a person "You're so snow drifts on the pine tree line and ocean just before the storm."
And also, in a world without telepaths, it likely makes no sense to say 'I like your quiet mind'.
Quiet minds. Hmmmm.
Anyway, given that her intended is like the love child of a dancing will-o-wisp mated with an urban electrical sprite, the calm makes a balancing kind of sense.
Do all non dysfunctional relationships make sense like that? A thing to ponder.
Meanwhile I'll just be amused at what I find to be an attractive force. Cause now I have to ponder my past and see who had the quieter minds.
PPS: Also is it just a hop skip away from quiet mind to 'Brrraiiiiiins!' ?
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I need to shake off 2009. I read this post by an lj friend about her NYE incident being a good samaritan. And all I can think about is that, if she were black the cops would not have been friendly, she would not currently have her car and she might even be in jail for doing a good deed.
Lessons of Life that 2009 Rubber Stamped On Me.
Does it wash off?
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2009
I don't like Glee. I don't want to hear about your squee, because I'm busy wincing at the ablism, racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia and other incidental careless moments of socio-political pain causing.
I've pretty much given up reading fannish fic and it's time I owned up to that. Reccs will just pile up unlooked at, because I'm tired of having to take a metaphysical drink before reading in case I see the rotten underskirt of someone else's psyche.
Or something not rotten but private and poking at sore places for me.
And if you publish professional fic and I really like it - I'll still read, but I'll borrow from the library and wait patiently for you to die, in hopes the next generation is a little less selfishly navel gazing and self prioritizing.
If it doesn't make me happy - Chuck It To Effing Hell.
That includes tv and movies and more.
There are some people who just aren't worth fart.
2010
Last night I made a first step in putting my joys and comforts first, in terms of whom I socialize with, whom I let near, whom I comfort and let comfort me, how adorable I want to seem, how much of myself I reveal - if I want to, when I want to.
My online front door opens onto a village of individuals whose lives I care about, want to know more about, from stubbed toes, to business triumphs, career moments and parental freak outs and more. And only from that select group of individuals will my eyes merely glaze over if their squee is something irksome to me, because their joy is joysome to me.
Honesty offers less chances of miscommunication and fumbling.
There are opportunities for me within the thing I love dearly (almost most) in the world. I should seize them. Seize them even if the stars are not aligned right, even if butterflies kaleidoscope in my stomach, even of my chest squeezes and I can barely breathe.
My carryover fandom is Activism.
PS: Partaking of ![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) medea_complex continuing to be awesome.
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It snowed.
Again.
I'm grateful I don't have to shovel it. But my plans to pick up my prescription is now up in the air (far less OYN plans), because I've no idea what the streets (and thus what the buses) are like. I was so happy when I got home and saw all the snow had melted *sigh*.
Baltimore City's Snow Page says there's no current Snow Event (or maybe that was Storm Event) - so I'm hoping that's a good sign.
Meanwhile my throat & tonsils are suddenly aching. Urgh.
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Alma from Rodrigo Blaas on Vimeo. This little video of supernatural doom, via, Karnythia via Yeloson jogged my memory of watching THE MIST at Zvi's folks over the holiday weekend and my inappropriate laughter. I'm fairly certain THE MIST is not meant to be a comedy and yet I couldn't stop laughing at all the panic; couldn't stop shaking my head at all the fool dawdling decisions and was not at all crushed by the ending - I just ended up shaking my head at how trauma so... traumatizes. I mean people just stop thinking and in some cases seem to lose the will to survive. I found myself thinking, maybe everyone needs a little trauma in childhood to kind of brace them to deal - which is probably not the wise psychological solution. If you've seen THE MIST, then you'll understand, perhaps, me shaking my head that some folk just couldn't bed down for the night and wait to see how things would look in the morning. If they had, it wouldn't have been an ode to stupidity and the chemical rush of nerves when one has seen horrible, horrible things. --- In More Post Feastmas News --- I'm currently wearing my new glasses. That is, glasses that had been brand spanking new 6 years ago, but when I put them on, they needed constant readjustments and I was getting hell a fed up with that particular glasses place (can't even remember what franchise it was, since that branch, I think, has since closed down. Anyway, things have been getting fuzzy and I had up lots of reminders to try the optometrist in 2010. But today while getting ready for therapy, things were SO fuzzy, I grabbed the brand new 6 year old glasses in their case, tugged them out and put them on. And lo and behold the fuzzy kitchen clock numbers materialized in crisp formation. Wore them out to therapy and the crispness did not depreciate. So I don't quite know what's going on, but the eye doctor visit can be bumped down a bit to later in 2010 if I have glasses currently working. On the other hand it's odd to be wearing glasses again after 6 years. I keep moving to take them off, thinking I've forgotten my sunglasses on, but nope, it's glasses. I will likely need to investigate getting some spongy bits for the end of one of the arms, so the glasses don't sit lopsided on my face. Right now though, I shall enjoy being able to sit back some from the screen without letters appearing to be teeny script. I might even see about adjusting my screen resolution again too. -- Feastmas -- The holiday was wonderful; peaceful, mellow (incredibly mellow) - it was a good counter-balance to prior anxiety to be in such an environment. The spread was AMAZING. I think I nommed more brisket than turkey and absolutely adored my Feastmas gift from Zvi of pineapple upside down cupcakes. I have some left, currently at home with me. I doubt they shall last till the new year. There was also SPARKLING BLUEBERRY JUICE. It was devoured by me. Oh the yum! THE YUM! And my favourite pound cake with chocolate icing. -- Post Feastmas -- Was snuggling! Zvi is squishy and warm! And giggly - very giggly :) (Also, I'm so glad of boo-ness! So. Glad!) --- No doubt I'm forgetting things, but tis goodness. And therapy today was a good start for 2010. Very clearing. Right now I'm hunting down tiny earbuds for my tiny ears to use the new mp3 player. While marveling at the colour crispness of the little screen and trying to figure out how the france to get it to move past settings and playing songs I can't hear (and likely don't want on it). It will undoubtedly make me rethink my want of a PMP/PMD/Personal Access Data Device(PADD ala Star Trek), since what I want now really will focus on colour (for some comics) and mobile web access and flv/dixx. Oh yes! And looking it up last night just before sleep I came across Rockbox, which might be the solution to my little sister's iPod woes (she's been having white screen of death) and was within warranty when she sent it to be fixed and they apparently shipped it back -UNFIXED- further cementing my loathing of the apple brand. But maybe given all I've seen about the firmware updates bricking the devices, alternative software is the way to go to get more usage out of the thing. And now to catch some rest, before long distance mutual movie viewing.
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Been home for an hour and change. Ordered my Xmas pizza. Wanted to sleep, but too hungry just to sleep. Was happy to see that my new method of leaving the cat on her own turned out well.
Treats & catnip resulted in a cat that was pretty mellow. So mellow in fact she wasn't hiding when I came in with two 'strangers', but was under the desk - asleep. And opened up an eyeball when folk left.
She's mostly talky right now.
Had a lovely Feastday and will write all about it at some other point in time, no doubt. Received lovely gifts and the ones I brought to give were also well received.
I laugh some at how my mother bought me an mp3 player at the beginning of 2009, but never got it to me. And my 2009 Holiday gift from not-really-in-laws-even-if-they-don't-believe-it, was an mp3 player. I'll be sorting that bit out in a bit too.
Definitely need to buy a USB hub though.
I'm hoping everyone had a lovely holiday and good feasting :)
(Oh and in other news, I'm chopping people off the feeds & journals I read, because irritation hinders enjoyment of life. And no matter what I found likeable about a person, if they're consistently doing things that hurt - no point to keep reading just because I've been reading them for years. Especially when I'm noticing a pattern. Long story short: )I Know It's Racist But The Special Effects Are AWESOME doesn't cut it for me either. And truthfully I don't know why I kept folk after seeing them pull a 'those people'.)
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Safely at Zvi's folks' place. I have had some wonderful Pineapple Upside Down Cupcakes (my holiday gift from Zvi). The only downside is my stomach rebelling about something - possibly the local water; possibly some fresh pineapple I had this morning (it may have been shock & awe fiber or something).
Plans for the day involve chillin', reading, and talking. Later tonight will be gift putting into bags-ing and placing under tree-ing.
*hugs and love to the flist*
Have A Gracious Set Of Holidays :)
PS: At some point I need to put blinky lights or something on my standard icon, but for now have 'Season of Light / Tree Of Life / Turn Of The Year'.
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| 2009-12-22 02:38 |
| Let's Talk About Depression |
| Public |
| depressed |
| depression |
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Because I mentioned it, but I didn't go into details about last week's therapy session involved and I don't have therapy tomorrow and I would also rather write this out, to remind myself than not.
( Cut in case anything under here ends up triggering. )
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Stumbled over an article about Wikipedia from a greater mess of articles about Wikipedia. I can't quite remember how I ended up surfing there, but I wanted to note the article brings up something I discovered for myself.
Jason Scott, the article writer (and I believe an original Wikipedia programmer), states plainly that energy is wasted, and interesting nuggets of information lost due to the easy access to edit and fiddle by anyone (including those without an account, only noted by IP addy, something I had not realized). Anyone can also include those with social capital in Wikipedia itslef, (often transferred into authority as an admin). And the end result is that people stop contributing content.
In my case I felt confused, crushed, angry and then walked away from an article that no one else had bothered to create; but where people felt it was suddenly necessary to rephrase my sentences and paragraphs, and correct my very British spelling as typos or mistakes. Then came others re-organizing the information I and someone else had hunted down.
A tv show is small potatoes compared to what else Wikipedia does and what I found out goes on with clashing philosophies or political points of view from climate change, to whether or not certain governors of certain tropical states have behaved continuously in a racist manner or have somehow earned themselves an out. But if something as small as a tv show had to be bullied about and contested and information re-arranged and sentences cut and the u's cut out because American spelling must dominate - how much more frustrating is it when it's experts in their fields being hand spanked and scolded by non-experts because there's a Wikipedia way and everything else. (And some of what I've found in my surfing has mentioned that Wikipedia cultivates an anti-elitism atmosphere with a distinct anti-respect towards experts.)
I still remember going to stare at my article, so happy I could contribute something about a tv show I'd loved and discovering that someone had marked it for deletion because I'd included either a screen shot or some official art I'd found. Apparently a screen shot isn't fair use, or something, if the fair use information is not laid out in a particular way or something else. It's all a blur of - but did they have to mark the WHOLE thing for deletion?
That dimmed the joy of one of the producers of the show finding the article and contacting me to correct info. That dimmed the joy of finding another fan interested in maintaining the page. The knowledge that someone could decide what I'd hunted down and spent hours researching and confirming could be deleted just like that. Yes, I'd saved the file, but still.
I did my best to sort it all out, but when it was over, it took about a year for me to look at the page again, and then I discovered even more sentence changes and rephrasing and words completely removed; my vocabulary erased. Looking at the site right now, I recognize nothing but some of the information. There's been things introduced that leave me shaking my head, especially considering how often I got smacked for not showing secondary sources.
That's how often a small potatoes page on Wikipedia gets edited.
That's how often even on a small potatoes page, editor favouritism happens.
I think I would have been better off putting up a fan page. And maybe if the initial wrestling on Wikipedia hadn't worn me out, I might have done. Maybe I still might, sometime in the future, when my show is no longer associated for me, with twitching disappointment.
That said, I'm thinking I might try Thesaurus.com for it bit. Or Britannia. And TV Tropes for my media needs.
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righteously pissed off
sleepy
get offa my lawn!
complex
pissed off
anxious
awake
exhausted
hungry