InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "tell me how bad I am!"

Willow (the_willow) wrote,
@ 2008-05-10 14:29:00

Entry tags:

about the world

Purple Mountains Majesty (comes with shotguns)
To darkrose,

This was originally a comment to your post.

Word.

When the video by Will.i.am showed up in email from Move.Org, I watched it. Thought it was nice. And then I deleted it. Because I really don't give a damn about who some celebrity (or celebrities) think is worth voting for.

A few days later I was sitting in my doctor's waiting room and there was a magazine there with the big piece being Obama On Healthcare. And I thought 'Why the hell not read what he has to say'. Because this would be from him, and not hype from his "slavishly enthusiastic fans". Yeah, that's how I saw them.

And he made sense. He made honest to goodness sense. And quotes from his wife made sense. And quotes against his wife, also noted in the article made me go 'Wait a min, wtf??'.

So I came home to look up the video online and found Will.i.am's website. And I listened to the words and realized I had to read the whole of this speech. So I found that online too and read it. And then read a few more of his essays.

And then I let that video be the thing to wake up my computer every morning for weeks. I had nothing against Hillary, but Obama made me want to go out and sign up for my citizenship test. He made me realize that there are other people who love America and hate America at the same time; love it for its ideals and hate it for how much and often it's been failing.

And I thought, this is a politician I could follow.

But I wasn't sure he'd win and I wasn't invested in him, I was just paying attention to him for the first time.

And then because I was paying attention I heard all the whispers and rumours and the digs from Hillary's campaign and I just got sadder and sadder.

Because while before I hadn't been paying attention to Obama, I'd been giddily excited at the thought of a possible woman President. I was all "Come on America, get with the times! Don't be the last nation to do this."

But that giddiness got kicked in the teeth when I realized voters were being told to choose not on the issues but on race vs sex. Sure it was sly at first. But my wtf still grew.

I can't even get into the list of things that turned my wtf all upside down and sideways and crushing. Ferarro was definitely one of them, as was the demand to repudiate Farrakhan, as was a bunch of white people getting all upset about Reverend Wright.

The hell???

But this latest 'hard working Americans, white Americans'? THIS BULLSHIT? When I come from some hard ass working Caribbean/Caribbean American Family and neighbhourhoods in NYC? When I know my step-grandfather got stuff left in his body after surgery and the doctor's didn't give a damn cause he was an old black guy and my mother had to rouse the family to make a fuss and get the old man properly seen to?

This bullshit? When I spent some formative years growing up in Crown Heights in Brooklyn? When I've known cabbies and store owners and bodega owners and people working in construction?

Hillary Clinton's campaign pissed me off a while ago. This newest shit is just putting up a wall between me and some of my friends. They're all for her and all their excitement makes me feel like they're part of the construction that's kicking me in the head and telling me to get my black ass over to the corner until I'm called for. That they view me now as the 'slavish enthusiast', which of course I'm not meant to turn around and use to describe them.

I've spent weeks praying that Obama lives, that some jackwipe doesn't do to him what's happened to so many, too many, black leaders in this country. And to have her further stirring up the hornet's nest?

Her actions and examples of America / Americanism are what have kept me backing away from this country and many of its citizens. Because I've been so sure that ideals aside, scratch the surface and this, people like her, are what I'd find.

After 8 years of Bush... I really want to see an America I can be proud to call my second home / my second country. And she's not part of that. She doesn't represent that.

(Post a new comment)

myhappyface
2008-05-10 02:22 pm UTC (link)

Hey. I found this post through your feed, which showed up on my LJ friendsfriends.

I've spent weeks praying that Obama lives

Me, too. I agree with everything else in your post, but this especially; since my primary interest in American history is the politics from 1950s onward, I spend a lot of time thinking about - and worrying about - assassinations, and when that article came out a few weeks ago (no security checks at an Obama rally, in motherfucking Dallas, of all places) I had cold chills for days. I feel like it's a concern that often gets shrugged off, but if we're still a country that can stomach what happens at detainee camps, how far are we from being one that can produce someone willing to kill in order to avoid having a man of color as supreme commander?

Sorry to vomit my fear all over your journal, but you are pretty much the only person I've seen talking about this.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

the_willow
2008-05-10 03:20 pm UTC (link)

It's depressing if I am one of the few people talking about it. But I read about Dallas too and how the Secret fucking Service stopped screening people because it was taking too long and they thought "Everyone looked fine."

WTF?

Like an assassin is going to look shifty-eyed and UPSET????

Did you know that over where SS men and women get trained, someone hung up a noose at one of the training facilities? Akin to what happened that kicked off the Jena 6? The person responsible got some slap on the wrist, mild suspension pending full investigation.

But that's two incidents now where I'm left wondering a) at a Secret Service that might not be willing to protect him and b) at Clinton's racist mud slinging, saying things she knows damn well could fire up some unhinged person out there. Does she want a mad man, or even just some emotionally upset white person to pick up a gun and get rid of her competition? Does she not care at all that she might be the trigger to someone else's gun? Or does she actually believe the shite that racism is over and it's just sexism to be fought now so that she's somehow in more danger than he is?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lurkerwithout 2008-05-10 06:57 pm UTC (link)
	Obama's campaign people admitted the Dallas non-screening thing was them not the Secret Service. But I hadn't heard what the result was from the noose incident. Thats pretty screwed up... (Reply to this) (Parent)

	darkrose 2008-05-10 05:59 pm UTC (link)
	Honestly? This is why I want Obama to pick Richardson as his running mate. If they assassinate Obama, they still lose. (Reply to this) (Parent)

fickle
2008-05-10 04:18 pm UTC (link)

Eh. I read political stuff even knowing that I'm going to disagree with it, just because I think it's important to know what different sides are thinking. Isolating yourself so that you only ever speak to people that agree with you/think the way you do is an insular tactic -- it's the equivalent of plugging your ears and going "la la la, I don't hear you!".

I don't argue politics with you because you're very strongly pro-Obama and I'm very strongly pro-Hillary, and I don't think that either of our opinions are likely to change even if we do argue*, but I do still read your political stuff. It was sweet of you to cut it, though.

Also, Obama's currently winning in superdelegates. So congratulations ^_~

*Plus, I really don't want another Sian debacle. Really.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_willow 2008-05-10 04:21 pm UTC (link)
	This wasn't about being insular. This was about me avoiding a fight because of what it means to me personally that you're very Pro-Hilary. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	lavendertook 2008-05-11 02:28 pm UTC (link)
	I was pro-Clinton until the white Americans comment this last week. Now I'm holding my nose about voting for her due to her racism the way I'm holding my nose about voting for Obama due to his sexist comments. Neither of them are progressives. Neither of them are all that different in their stances. They're both better than the Repugs, and I'll vote for either of them. (Reply to this)